If there's one thing most people don't want to hear, it would probably be seeing one person blaming his own failures and mistakes on others. This is one clear sign that this person is not taking responsibility for his life. They own their bodies, they own their minds, they chose their actions, and so how come when something goes wrong, others are to blame?
Part of our responsibility as adults is to accept and acknowledge mistakes when we make them. This differentiates an adult from a needy child. Responsibility is knowing the repercussions of your actions. Responsibility is also enjoying the fruits of your own labour.
The same goes for people in business. Too many business owners refuse to take responsibility for a few mistakes they make in business - making changes at the wrong time, dealing with wrong people, ruining a business relationship or even hiring incompetent people. But if you do not take responsibility for your own business, then who will?
Some people however, are not aware of how to be responsible. Here are some points to help one know how to take responsibility for one's life.
Eliminate blame, eliminate excuses. Listen to the voices in your mind. Are you shifting responsibility for your wrong decisions on others? When things go wrong, do you quickly point fingers at your co-workers? Do you blame your parents for your own lack of discipline, or for not giving you the best education? If you are not living comfortably, do you blame your spouse for not earning enough? And when you get reprimanded by customers for delays, do you quickly ask your staff to explain to the client why HE/SHE was amiss in his/her duties?
All these sound like office situations from hell. It is never healthy, both for one's mind and self-esteem, to work alongside a person who is guilty of any of the blaming tactics listed above. In fact, it is very rare for anyone to endure working for someone who never takes responsibility for his mistakes.
If you know you engage in any of the examples listed, the best way to deal with it is to talk to people, and hear them say it to you. Hold casual meetings, maybe even over lunch or while having a cup of coffee, and encourage them to give you some feedback on how you are as their boss or co-worker. Why is this effective? Because irresponsible people are most often in denial about their irresponsibility. Hearing the truth will most likely jolt them into reality.
Make amends. Change for the better. The best and surest way for people to take responsibility is by changing bad habits and putting these known habits on your "not-to-repeat/do" list. Even if you do have some justification for being irresponsible, use your maturity, knowledge and your own heart to propel you towards change. Only you can change your own self. No one can change your bad habits for you. If you know that you hurt and offend people by doing certain things, then vow never to repeat them. It will be difficult, but n real significant change is really easy. Do it for others first, then do it for your self - and that's real responsibility there - when you put others' well being ahead of your own.
You have to realize that if you choose to do bad, then you must suffer the repercussions. You cannot expect other people to be responsible for your bad behaviour. If you interview people in prison, perhaps more than half of them will tell you that their situation is a result of irresponsibility - not acting rationally when faced with a trying and tempting situation. But these people are facing the consequences for their irresponsibility. Perhaps if you keep them in mind, you may be convinced to make a change for the better. No one like penalties, punishment or loss of their ability to live life to the fullest. Exactly the case in business - you suffer the repercussions when you do not act fairly.
Set your sights on freedom from your bad behaviour, and do all you can to get it. Ask yourself, what would really make you happy? C'mon, do you really feel good when another person gets the rap for something you are responsible for? Chances are, you will never really have peace of mind. If you think your parents really damaged you psychologically for their own responsibility, then talk with them and clear the air. Only until you have settled long-standing issues will you ever achieve your full potential as a person. If you are unhappy, go and pursue the life you want, and not blame others for not making life easier for you. One last point - No one but you can get you on the road to change.
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Michael Griffiths is the CEO and Founder of Secrets Of A Super Life, providing individuals with personal development strategies to increase their purpose, passion, happiness and life fulfilment. For your free life success pack please visit http://www.mysuperlifetoday.com
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