"I'm not upset that you lied to me. I'm upset that from now on I can't believe you". -Friedrich Nietzsche
It seems that most of us unfortunately have been on the receiving end of betrayal at one time or another in our lives. And, for those of you who have experienced it, there isn't anything quite like the overwhelming gut punch that accompanies being deceived; especially if by someone you love.
When faced with betrayal inside of a relationship, lost trust is an uphill battle and one that you and your partner need to be prepared to work through for the long haul. It's not to say that with time and commitment you can't rebuild that trust again; but it truly is a long, hard road.
Depending on the level of betrayal you are dealing with will factor into whether it's even worth the blood, sweat and tears of trying to fix it or not. Broken trust shatters the foundation of your relationship and can cause so much angst and resentment it's difficult to get beyond.
What I have seen with most people, myself included, that even through your most valiant attempts to salvage the broken pieces of the relationship, ultimately you could never feel the same again.
Now, some people may be able to handle that, I personally wasn't up for the assignment. I'd rather wade through the broken pieces, through the hurt, disappointment and pain of ending it, than to continue to put myself through the mistrust, fear and doubts that plague each suspicious event that arises; and they will arise.
LEARN TO TRUST YOUR GUT INSTINCT
The most important thing is to learn to trust yourself. Your instinct is an inherent part of your protective radar that "instinctually" knows when a storm is brewing. You can feel the portending omens approaching so DO NOT ignore your gut instinct for it won't deceive you.
Learn to trust yourself. When someone says something that doesn't feel right or when there is one broken promise after another that reoccurs; these gnawing feelings are there for a reason. They are the signs telling you that something is wrong.
Once you know that you are with someone that you can't trust; its then time to decide if that's how you want to live your life. If you start making excuses for their behaviors you are only setting yourself up for a painful fall.
If your partner can't be honest with you, at least learn to be honest with yourself; because if you can't face the reality that you are with someone that lies to you, you are actually lying to yourself.
There really is life on the other side of a broken relationship. Don't settle for less than you deserve, it is simply not worth living your life with question marks, fears and doubts. Instead, decide what you want and have faith that it's never too late to have it.
Your choices WILL determine how you live so, what is your choice?
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Susan Russo is an author and coach who has helped people from around the world move beyond heartache and pain after their breakup or divorce. Would you like to heal your broken heart sooner rather than later? Find out exactly how with Susan'sFREE copy of the 7 Steps to heal your broken heart at:http://www.whystay.com
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