Are You In An Abusive Relationship?

"How many times do you need to get hurt for you to know it's time to let go?" -Anonymous

All relationships come with their ups and downs, good times and bad. That's normal. In healthy relationships couples will typically find a mutual way to resolve their issues by compromising, communicating and balancing the give and take of their relationship together.

But when you find yourself in an abusive relationship what you will find 99% of the time is that you are always wrong and they are always right. Period.

It's their way or the highway. There is little or no respect for your feelings, opinions, needs or desires. As a matter of fact, how dare you even consider anything other than what your partner wants and needs?

ABUSE IS ABOUT CONTROL

An abusive partner is often very controlling and when they feel like they are losing control is when the gauntlet comes down even harder. They act so big, bad and tough when the reality is abusive people are weak people. They cover their weakness and insecurity with abuse!

There are several different ways in which they will try and control you. The more obvious of which is physical abuse. When a partner attacks you physically it is the ultimate means in which to scare you into keeping you under their control. If you disobey them or disagree with them in any way they keep you in line with the threat of or actual act of physical harm.

They may even convince you that you are to blame and you deserve it; which by the way, is the furthest thing from the truth. And if you begin to believe this is when you need help a.s.a.p. Abuse is an effective means of brainwashing a person into believing they aren't good enough.

And severe and prolonged abuse can make the victim believe that they actually aren't good enough and no one else would want them. Therefore, they want you to believe that you better stay where you are and put up with it because you're lucky that you even have someone.

ANY FORM OF ABUSE LEAVES SCARS WHETHER PHYSICAL OR PSYCHOLOGICAL

There are many other forms of abuse that may not be as obvious. But, although the wounds they inflict aren't physically recognizable like a black eye, broken nose or being beaten black and blue; they still leave invisible scars that affect your ability to think logically and it destroys your mental well-being.

Verbal, emotional and mental abuse are as debilitating and destructive as physical abuse and their long term effects stay on long after the physical scars have healed.

NO ONE ON THIS PLANET DESERVES TO BE ABUSED - PARTICULARLY IN THE NAME OF LOVE

So, if you find yourself in a relationship with someone that tells you they love you but their actions, words and behavior proves otherwise; get clear on one very important fact: this isn't love. And, the longer you stay and put up with it the deeper you will be stuck in finding your way out.

Dig deep down inside and decide if this is the way you want to live the rest of your life because trying to change an abusive partner is like trying to change a monkey into a horse.

It's not to say that an abusive partner can't get help with serious ongoing therapy by a trained professional. But, first you have to get them to admit that they have a problem and next they have to be willing to commit to going to therapy sessions. Good luck!

So instead of trying to change someone else, maybe it's you that needs to make a commitment to yourself to find a way out of the abuse and begin to realize that what you really deserve is to be treated with kindness, respect and love.


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Are you in an abusive realtionship trying to decide whether to stay or go? Do you want to find out how to stop wasting your time and begin living your best life now, go to: http://www.susan-russo.com Susan's work has inspired people from all over the world to take back their power!


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