First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes divorce court. Or so it would seem in our society of disposable marriages. When we hear, "I want to know the way how to save my marriage," it is most refreshing. We think, "Ah ha! Someone somewhere is willing to do the work toward a healthy marriage and they are willing to do it now." Is that someone you? Great! Let's get started.
We all know the key to a successful marriage: Together, let us say: Communication is the key to a successful marriage. Now you say, "Communication is the key to save my marriage."
Women are especially notorious for withholding feelings, assuming their spouse should know what's wrong. Wrong! Talk to your partner and tell him/her in a calm voice when something about the relationship bothers you. Don't focus on what your spouse is doing wrong. Focus on a resolution that would serve each other's highest good.
Most marriages in trouble could benefit from a spiritual check-up. This does not mean religious practices as religion is personal to each individual. Rather, it's the little courtesies and kindnesses that add up to a healthy marriage. When you wake-up, send out loving thoughts of peace, love and harmony to your partner.
Hold hands and say grace at breakfast. Tell your wife/husband, "I appreciate all that you do and all that you are." Never take your marriage partner for granted. Rather than criticizing, nagging and condemning, show your love in little ways. Before retiring at night, talk about any disappointments or irritations. Forgive each other if either of you said or did anything that day that caused hurt feelings.
The way to build a happy marriage is on a foundation of love, beauty, mutual respect and unwavering belief that something "out there" is bigger than you. For example, take turns reading and discussing passages from your favorite holy book. Sit close together and absorb each other's warm energy. You'll be amazed at how quickly this will get you outside yourself and your worries about the marriage.
Divorce is an individual problem. In many cases, divorce is not the correct solution. But, when a spouse is an abuser or is hooked on drugs or alcohol, divorce may be the only solution.
We trust your plea; "save my marriage" was not based on the old ways that divorce is wrong. Divorce is accepted in our modern society. True marriage is of the heart; when two hearts blend lovingly, sincerely and harmoniously, divorce is not the best answer.
Do you see it NOW? You have initiated an honest, open line of communication. You have sent out thought waves of loving kindness to your spouse. You are appealing to him/her on a higher level. You are saving your marriage by example!
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