Monday, January 9, 2012

To Get Over Him - The Other Side of Hope

Copyright (c) 2012 Chris J Roberts

Loving someone is beautiful but the ordeal of having to get over him is really terrible. There are a number of reasons why we fall in love and a number of reasons why we fall out of love. Experts believe that you fall in love with a person in whom you find your own best qualities and a contradiction of your bad qualities. And when such a person is found, he seems like your ideal match, your perfect soul mate. A common cultural and moral background also helps people fall in love with each other.

But sadly relationships end and you find yourself in situations where you have to move the past behind. All the loving memories start to haunt you. And many a times you think it would be impossible for you to start fresh because you still love him and feel attached to him. But sometimes you just have to analyze your mistakes that lead to a wrong decision. You need to first do a complete self-evaluation. You need to know what is holding you back now!

If you were happy in a past relationship, and your partner broke up the relationship, you may feel distraught and find it difficult to think about a new present. At such a time even if you meet someone else, you will tend to match up the two. And what would make it further difficult to get over your old partner is you find that he is better than your new partner.

At first you may desire to get into a relationship with someone who can only fill the sudden emotional gap created by the exit of your last partner. Though the new man may be funny, sweet and a complete gentleman, and even better than your old partner, you will find it difficult to adjust in this new relationship because the new guy would only be a pillar of strength, not a person you can love.

Then, if you enter into a relationship with someone just because he reminds you of your old partner, you will find it very tough to get over the bad past. Don't date someone who just looks like your old partner, has similar habits, etc if you want to get over him. In such a case, you will again try to match the two up and thereby won't be any compatibility left between your new partner and you.

It's difficult to see brighter side instantly if your partner abruptly goes away from your life. In order to get back to your normal self, you need to know the reason for the rift. If he refuses to communicate with you, you won't get any closure and it will end up frustrating you. You need to know what exactly happened and where was your fault.

You need to realize that after a break up, your life undergoes a lot of changes. If you are in another relationship, it affects you in further adverse manner. Communicate your decision to him and tell him that you want to move ahead in life. This will not only clear the air, it will also give your morale a boost and you will feel more confident. However, if you see a glimmer of hope and want to win him back, there is no harm in making one final effort before you absolutely decide to get ahead in life.

And finally, if you have to get over him, remind yourself that there are other fish in the sea. This may have been your best relationship, but that doesn't mean it was the best relationship ever. Go on a new search and find your true soul mate. If you repent over your past, you will only suffer. You can once again open the doors of happiness for yourself if you get over him in good faith.


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