Tuesday, January 10, 2012

Get Over a Past Relationship - Let Bygones Be Bygones

Copyright (c) 2012 Chris J Roberts

It is never easy to forget or get over a past relationship, but sometimes we need to do it as certain relationships can turn out to be ugly and stress us beyond imagination. While the good relationships leave a lasting impression on our minds, we have to make an effort to move on to greener pastures in life.

Being impulsive and starting a new relationship without making an effort to remove the bad phase of your life can spell doom for you, as you may end up feeling all the more distraught. Take your time to forget the bad past but make sure you don't distance yourself from the world around you for a very long time while trying to get over a relationship that did no good to you.

Relationships that develop as a rebound are not usually lasting. Getting into a rebound relationship and that too before you are done with your old relationship, can be unfair as you won't be able to express the emotions required to sustain a relationship. As a result, the next relationship will also end on a sour note leaving you even more distraught. So before you enter into another relationship, you have to make sure that you forget the past or at least be true to yourself and make an earnest effort to make your life better not miserable.

Learn to move on. If there is anything worse than not being able to forget already ruined relationship, it is wallowing in self-pity. Don't feel victimized by your past…instead learn lessons from it while emerging as a stronger person. Agreed it is easier said than done and most people can't get over their mistakes while learning lessons from it. But the ones who have been able to do it successfully find themselves in happy relationships once again.

In order to make right decision, you also need to concentrate on the positive points in yourself. Remind yourself that you are not the one to be bogged down by painful memories. You can make right decisions by being confident of yourself. If you find it agonizing to re-think over your past relationship, seek professional help or turn to similar individuals who are also in the same state. Sharing your problems and finding a vent for them would surely help you. And while making the efforts to move on from your relationship, ensure that you protect your self-esteem at all times.

At such times when you need to re-examine yourself, you have to realize that there is no harm or shame in seeking the services of a therapist. At such times you may feel lonely and lose your ground. You may also blame yourself for everything. A therapist can not only help you to learn from your past mistakes, but he/she can also make you realize that the world is indeed full of good people who will not analyze your every action and rather help you to forget or get over a past relationship that will help you in making better decisions in the future.

The process of having to forget or get over a past relationship is not easy and you certainly can't avoid it. You need to forget or get over a past relationship and only then can you be content in a new relationship. A fantastic way to find happiness in love once again is to completely let bygones be bygones.


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