Self-evaluation. People say that the key to successful relationships is putting your partner before yourself. While this is true in some situations, others require you to take a look at yourself and your needs. People who work to be happier, more self-actualized individuals typically make better, more confident partners.
Get it out. Arguing isn't always a bad thing in relationships. Pent up anger leads to resentment which can build over time, slowly deteriorating a relationship. Before you know it, you're splitting up over the small things and often can't remember the origin of discontent.
Have sex. This may seem like common sense in a relationship, but when couples begin to derail, sex usually falls of the map. If this is the case, set aside one day per week and make it a priority to have sex on that day, even if you're not necessarily in the mood.
Be selective about who you vent to after an argument. People who blab about their problems to every gossipy friend, their Facebook pals and their parents are likely to turn a brood of angry friends and family against their partner. This only deepens the divide in the relationship. If you really need to talk about big problems, consider a relationship therapist who will keep your conversations private.
Leave work at the office. If you've had a particularly stressful day and need to tell your partner about it, give yourself 15 or 20 minutes to do so, then move on. Evenings at home should be your time to reconnect, and you can't do so if you're constantly griping about deadlines and co-workers.
Make a budget. This is an old but good bit of advice for making relationships work. Managing money is hard to do on an individual basis, but when two incomes are mixed into the pot, it can be even more of a challenge. Put together a basic budget and come to an agreement about entertainment spending.
Look at the long term. Many people - especially women - think bringing up the future will scare away their partners. However, if you and your significant other aren't on the same long-term path, this is sure to cause conflict down the road.
Amass experiences and memories. Gift giving is great in relationships, especially sweet, spontaneous gift giving. But what will last are your memories not your material items. Go on weekend trips together; cook meals together; plan at least one excursion per month - anything from a Saturday hike to fancy night at the theater; and work to build a supportive, content group of friends around you.
Let it go. It is important in relationships to choose your battles, as cliché as that may sound. It's easy to become bitter about dirty dishes remaining in the sink for days, laundry not getting folded or grocery shopping being put off too long. Ask yourself, are these things really important?
Relationships are the cornerstones of our lives, but if you've ever been in one, you know they can be difficult at times. Remember that relationships are work, and if you're ever in a place where you feel you need professional, unbiased advice or guidance, don't hesitate to reach out to a relationship counselor in your area.
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Relationships are the cornerstones of our lives, but if you've ever been in one, you know they can be difficult at times. Remember that relationships are work, and if you're ever in a place where you feel you need professional, unbiased advice or guidance, don't hesitate to reach out to a relationship counselor in your area. For real relationship advice, visit Dr. Dwight Owens' relationship blog, http://www.askdro.com
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