Please STOP begging for love and admiration if your loved one isn't willing to give it. Stop begging for the attention. Stop begging for the compliments. Stop begging for the love. Stop begging for the affection. Stop begging for the praise, hugs, kisses, walks, smiles, laughter, etc. It will only lead you to depression, self-hatred, or cause you to start doing things against your character (such as cheating) simply because you feel you must have those needs met by someone. If you become dependent on receiving that love from another person, you can easily fall into a trap that may take a lifetime to get out of.
How do you beg you might ask? You beg when you constantly whine and complain, or in some cases, get upset, when your emotional or physical needs aren't being met. You beg when you allow that person to send you into depression because you don't feel attractive or wanted. You beg when you silently cry because you feel he/she doesn't love you. You beg when you show your signs of hurt and despair each time you see someone else getting the love that should be reserved for you.
For example, you see your partner smiling and laughing with another person, and you instantly get upset because you don't experience that when the two of you are alone. Perhaps your loved one doesn't hold you close or shower you with compliments, so you respond with an attitude, or shut down completely and go into your little depression mode, hoping he/she will figure out what's wrong. I know… I've been there!
All of that behavior is a form of begging in my opinion. I know this because I became a master at begging for love. I mastered begging by forgetting to love myself, forgetting to compliment myself, forgetting to live my life, and by forgetting I was an amazing person because I was waiting on someone else to validate I was good enough to be loved.
Stop waiting for that other person to grab your hand, and motivate yourself by moving forth in your life and acknowledging that you are a dynamic, unique, beautiful, talented person (with or without the love or attention from another individual).
If you are in a dating relationship and experiencing these issues, I strongly suggest you move on with your life and make better choices. Please remember this: If you decide to marry that person who has continued to deny you love, affection and attention, it's your fault! You have a very good understanding of how that person shows love and affection now, so do not all of a sudden expect a lot to change simply because you will be married or having children!
For those of you in a committed marriage, get your life together! Open your eyes and realize that 9 times out of 10, your loved one already knows your needs and desires. Sometimes your significant other may want to extend their love, and sometimes not. Therefore, getting upset, depressed, or dropping hints, will do you no good. In fact, the constant nagging simply makes you look desperate. Stop begging for love! Deal with it by learning how to love yourself, and take care of yourself (mentally, physically, and spiritually).
Counseling isn't a bad thing, and I highly recommend this if both parties are open to it; however, if your loved one doesn't want counseling, I have some sound words of advice: Don't ever give someone control over how you feel about yourself, nor allow anyone to keep you from loving yourself or moving forth with your dreams!
I've even heard of some people purposely gaining weight, giving in to depression, or allowing their dreams to pass them by, simply because they want to show the other person they are hurting. Not only is it a pathetic step for an adult to take (I know, I've been there), but it's also counterproductive to your life!
Take your confidence back and STOP acting like a victim! Show love to the other person, but don't drain yourself to the point where you have no love left for yourself. You were not placed on this earth to beg for love or attention from anyone.
DREAM… even if you can't share it. LAUGH… even if that other person won't join in. GROW… even if you must sprout without support. DANCE… even if you must waltz alone. LOVE… even if it isn't returned. Get your act together, put the tears aside, and remember, from this day forward, don't you EVER beg for love or attention from anyone but yourself!
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Hi, I am Zenja Norful-Glass. My motivational products and books (featured on MSNBC, ABC News, Fox News, etc) all have one goal in mind... To keep you moving FORWARD. Visit http://www.UnlockingGreatness.com for the motivation to keep going.
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