Most people need a little self-esteem boost now and then.
Self-esteem is all about how we feel about ourselves. When our self esteem is low, we can feel anxious and depressed, we can find ourselves in abusive relationships, and be prevented from reaching our true potential.
There can also be cons to self esteem. For instance, when a person's sense of self worth is overbloated, it can turn into arrogance or what is termed 'narcissism', and this can create problems. Such people can have difficulty accepting and learning from their own mistakes and can develop a false sense of entitlement.
Developing a balanced level of self-esteem is key. For some, a healthy, high self-esteem develops naturally. But for others, developing a healthy self-esteem takes some work. Check out these pointers to give your self-esteem a kick start.
1. Draw up a list of your best qualities - For some people with diminished self-esteem, even contemplating making a list of their good points seems like an impossible task, but it can be really helpful for raising self-esteem. If you find this task challenging, think about what others say about you. What positive compliments have you received? Begin with those and then work from there. Jot your good qualities down using "I" and the present tense. For example, "I am a kind and generous person."
2. Regular affirmations - Take another peek at the list you made. Choose your favorite qualities to use to do daily affirmations. Take those statements and write them down on cue cards and stickie notes. Put the stickie notes where you will read them everyday, such as on your computer screen, mirror, or refrigerator. When you see them, take a couple of minutes to repeat them several times to yourself. Put notecards in your purse or wallet where you are sure to come across them on a regular basis. When this happens, take a moment to read them to yourself a few times. In just a little while you can switch some of your best qualities for some of the other qualities on your list.
3. Keep some perspective - People generally don't talk about their challenges, disapointments, and struggles in life, but that's not because they don't have them. How we decide to approach these things will directly influence levels of self-esteem, joy and success. The really successful and confident people in life aren't those who have faced few dificulties and challenges, they are those who have viewed them as simply a part of life and have powered through anyway, learning as they go. Your failures don't mean that you are a failure, they just mean you need to reassess the situation and the way you approach it and tackle it from a different angle.
4. Make yourself the priority - A large part of increaseing your self esteem is accepting you are deserving of your own love. Respect yourself enough to make time for yourself. Take care of yourself when you're having a difficult time. Say 'no' when you need to and don't feel bad about it. Make your needs clear to others and ask for what you need. (If you find it difficult to say 'no', then look for some assertiveness training, or get a book on the subject.)
Employ these 4 simple tips and you will be well on your way to boosting your self-esteem. Above all, remember to be kind to yourself and give yourself as much love as you give to the important people in your life. You certainly deserve it!
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Peter Field is the author of 'The Chi of Change' for special offers please visit http://www.ChiofChange.com Information on 1-2-1 sessions may be found at http://www.peterfieldhypnotherapy.co.uk
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