A dearth of books are now available that share tips on how to build your self confidence. Many of these tips range from being aware of your strengths and celebrating them to focusing on what makes you happy. While these tips are helpful and can strengthen your self-confidence, if you don't have the foundation for practices to be built upon, then many of these tips will not be long lasting. This can cause a tremendous amount of frustration for those that are using these tips and are not seeing any permanent improvement in their own level of self-confidence.
The foundation that needs to be in place before using a process to increase your confidence level is adopting the mindset of being unconditionally responsible. Being unconditionally responsible means that you realize that you are the creator of your experiences, whatever they appear to be. You come to realize you had a hand in influencing the outcome of what you are experiencing. When you accept this frame of mind, you actually empower yourself because you can then begin to wrap your head around the fact that if you created or at least influenced your experience, you create it differently if you don't like what you are currently experiencing. With that understanding, you begin to feel less like you are a victim to your circumstances and you actually have some say in what happens to you, the "good" and the "bad". Using this concept on a day to day level is the beginning of the core foundation for having self-confidence.
In addition to being responsible, you must also be unconditional. This is important because being unconditional allows you to have the courage to look at your reality and what you are experiencing, and what you do to create/influence your reality. Being unconditional means you are not judging what you are experiencing and what you have created. There is no lesser or greater; it just is what it is. Understand that all your experiences are there only to clarify what you say you want in life and how you want to experience your life. Sometimes, you can't know what you want until you experience what you don't want. Judging the experience as something that you did or didn't deserve, only keeps you from receiving the empowering message and insight that would allow you to move to the next level in understanding what you do need to do to have the kind of experiences you would love to have. If you look at your experiences as just experiences, then removing the judgment will truly build up
your self-confidence because you are no longer repeating and reinforcing limiting and self-deprecating thoughts to yourself that tear down your confidence.
When you know that you can make no mistakes when it comes to the experiences in your life, there is a certain type of freedom you have that no one can take away.
This brings up the third point of that unconditional responsiblity foundation. Even though nothing you do is cause for judgment, it does not mean that you are released from any damage or harm that you would cause on another. If you have harmed another, you must be responsible for that damage you caused them. The good thing is, if you caused the damage, you have the ability to fix it.
Building self-confidence is simpler than you might think if you have the foundation of unconditional responsibility firmly in place. With that foundation in place, any other tips you may receive later on will be more long lasting and more effective in raising your confidence level to even greater heights.
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